Why don't people talk to me

Why am I exhausted talking to people?

Last update: September 24, 2020

Do you feel that you are unable to meet up with others because you are tired of talking to people? Do you think that engaging with your social circle is wasted time and do you find it difficult to get in touch with others? If you answered yes to these questions, then this article is for you because it will explain why talking to others can be so stressful.

First of all, let's make it clear that if someone feels uncomfortable talking to other people, they don't always have a problem. This means that there are personality types that are characterized by not having so much "perseverance" when it comes to making contact with their fellow human beings and interacting on a social level, which is not synonymous with a mental problem. There are also people who are afraid of speaking in front of an audience, which can be confused with the fact that it exhausts them to devote themselves to their social environment, with which they actually have nothing in common.

But there are also mental disorders that make it very difficult to open up and talk to people. For example, someone who has depression or anxiety disorder usually has problems with such situations because they focus too much on themselves and are therefore not in tune with other people.

Why it sucks you to talk to people

Below we're going to highlight some of the main reasons why you can feel burned out, tired, or exhausted when you talk to people around you.

Certain personality types

There are different personality types and according to the author we are referring to, there are different classifications and categorizations of the same. But practically all personality profiles have one common, well-known trait, and that is what is known as introversion. This personality trait is not something that one owns 100% or not; it is not a question of whether it is there or not, but rather that we all have this characteristic to a greater or lesser extent.

Introversion is a widely recognized personality trait. This is the tendency of people to live in their inner world and to feel comfortable and happy in situations in which there are few people or in which they are allowed to be who they are and express his feelings whenever he wants, without any pressure.

The counterpart to introversion is extraversion. However, it is important to keep in mind that the vast majority of people fall on the broad spectrum between introversion and extraversion, so that even if we are more socially minded, we can all have days when we don't feel like talking to people and it even exhausts us to follow conversations.

It takes a great deal of energy for the introverted person's brain to talk to others and that is why it is so exhausting for them. It's not that their brains have a hard time connecting with others, Instead, other activities such as creativity, introspection, reflection and questioning are simply more important to them than becoming socially active.

That is why it is advisable for introverted people to spend time alone with themselves and from time to time with the social environment. We want to emphasize that there is absolutely nothing wrong with feeling this way.

Introversion, i.e. the tendency to look inside, can be one of the reasons why talking to others is exhausting for a person.

Bad frame of mind or demotivation

Bad frame of mind or demotivation may make people feel like they arethat everything is difficult for them, that it takes a lot of energy to surround themselves with others, to go about their work or everyday tasks.

Accordingly, when your frame of mind and personal motivation are in the basement, it is normal to find yourself exhausted talking to people. The reason is that you feel that it doesn't help you to surround yourself with people around you, they don't motivate you and they even steal your time if you are demotivated or in bad shape.

Demotivation and a bad mood can also be reasons why it takes energy to talk to others.

It is true that we can improve our emotional state at such moments when we are talking to someone, but for this strategy to work, you have to carefully choose who you are to talk to. Above all, it is important to avoid people who only transfer their problems and complaints to you in a conversation, as the result is that their negative feelings put a lot of strain on you instead of creating the feeling that someone is listening to you.

Another reason why you may feel exhausted the moment you talk to people can be uncertainty, the fact that you don't know who to talk to about your problem. Furthermore, we should not leave it unsaid that a bad mood also goes hand in hand with the problem of staying alert and being an active part of social events. How you feel on an emotional level thus affects your ability to converse and surround yourself with others. That in turn may lead to the uncertainty just mentioned.

So if you feel exhausted every time you talk to others, remember that it is necessary, even if it costs you strength, because we are all social beings and we deprive ourselves of remaining sources of motivation when we isolate ourselves.

One way to improve your situation could be choose more carefully who to talk to about what topics. It could be that because you are an introverted person, you surround yourself with very extroverted people who “demand” that you get involved socially, even though you do not feel like it at the moment.

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