How do I lose feelings for someone

Five feelings that you shouldn't confuse with love

Who does not know it? The excitement when you see him, the butterflies in your stomach, maybe even the longing to be with him. For now, it seems like he's the only one you could feel that way about. But is it really love?

Misconception # 1: Better anyone than nobody

Imagine finding out that someone has feelings for you. Actually, someone you've never noticed before, or just someone you don't otherwise have much to do with. You are not used to someone caring about you and falling in love with you, but then suddenly it happens. You always wanted to be in a relationship with someone, go for walks hand in hand, do couple things, but nobody was really interested in you.

Now it's only up to you to accept it. You start to imagine how often you think about this person and that he or she is actually really cute and doesn't even look bad. This is a dangerous situation because you think you have fallen in love too, but in reality you are only imagining the feelings because the longing for attention prevails. You want someone who loves you and since that is exactly what you have found, you want to do everything possible not to lose the feeling. So think twice about whether you are really in love or just pretending to be because you are flattered by the other person's attention and love.

Fallacy # 2: Safety and Convenience

You've been in a relationship for a long time or in love with someone for a long time and all of a sudden you meet someone new who seems much more interesting and exciting to you. You start to feel something, but what is it? After a while, you try to convince yourself that you have no feelings towards this person, or you may try to cover it up by telling yourself that you already have a partner who loves you.

But right here is the problem: it is the fear of the unknown and the comfort that you feel in the partnership and that you do not want to risk. But even that is no longer real love, but rather the fear of drawing a line by honestly telling your partner and working on it together or deciding to break up.

Misconception # 3: The unattainable

The feeling is easily confused with that of love and being in love. It is the hunting instinct that slumbers in us humans. You may only feel drawn to the person because you know full well that you can't win them over anyway. This person may even be already in a relationship. But as soon as it becomes available to you, you quickly lose interest. It is a clear indication that your feelings towards this person have very little to do with real love. With this you challenge yourself to prove something and take the opportunity to get involved in real and deeper feelings.

Misconception No. 4: The acting talent

How well do you really know the person you think you love? Many people “fall in love” with just one facet of a person, such as the role of an actor. You automatically start to like the person from the film and to imagine that none of this can be a role and that everything has to be right. But in the end, it's just an actor who plays his part. There is a tendency to lie to yourself by not wanting to believe that this person could really be different. But before you talk about love, you should at least get to know the person better and deal with their inner values. Because, as the old saying goes, not everything that glitters is gold.

Misconception # 5: Wrong interpretation

Here it often happens that you fall in love with someone because you misinterpret the signs of the other person. Very often you imagine that the other person feels something for you, which in many cases is not. But this is where a lot of people fall in love and, unfortunately, are always disappointed in the end because they haven't reflected enough. Of course, the ego is inclined to relate all good things to itself, but it is not wrong to seek the opinion of a friend before getting high hopes. Or to reflect for yourself whether the person's behavior could not have been mere niceness.

By and large, you have to be clear about your feelings to be able to tell if you love someone or if they are superficial feelings that don't last. It does not help to lie to yourself or to imagine something just because it is flattering to your own ego.


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Pamela Petric was born in 2004. She is currently in the 10th grade at grammar school and in her free time is particularly interested in journalistic writing, as well as stories and art.

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Category: Love & SexualityTags: Relationship, Disappointment, Friendship, Love, Love, Separation